What does true friendship look like? Like true women-getting-together-empowering-each-other?
I was recently having coffee with a friend and as we sat there sipping our drinks we shared the mutual frustration of the reality that friendships with women are hard! I’m not talking about the surface-level groups of friends that exist today, I see those everywhere. It’s easy to have relationships without depth. You know the ones where you get along just enough because you enjoy the same activities or are in the same stages of life, but also the ones where you don’t feel you can deeply share what’s happening in your heart?
But despite those in my life, I’ve learned lately that I need deeper relationships; relationships where I feel encouraged, lifted up, listened to, and drawn back to the Father with every word. A place where I can be real and honest, where I can vent the struggles that are happening, while at the same time be surrounded by hope-filled perspectives and positive, uplifting words.
So as this friend and I were venting about this common struggle, I was hit with some truth.
God said to me “It starts with you.”
I was like, wait…me? No, no, no I get that, but I need others to…
“It starts with you.”
So here is my encouragement to you as I process this today: it starts with you. It starts with you opening up, with you cultivating a courage-filled environment filled with the values of God. It starts with you being vulnerable, with you being honest, with you having a hope-filled perspective. If you want more hope in your life a good place to start is in your heart and let it spread through every conversation you have. If you want more communities of women who are uplifting, focus on being uplifting in your own life and to those around you.
The truth is that it is our job to show people what Jesus looks like; to love like Him, to give grace like Him, to listen like Him, to empower like Him (more on this in my Be. Love.post). Our job is to come alongside those in their brokenness and frustration and present them with the truth of hope that can be found only in Him. And when women come together around the truths of the Kingdom, breakthrough happens. When vulnerability collides with the hope in Christ, breakthrough happens. When you step out and make your relationships intentional, breakthrough will happen.
God didn’t intend for us to walk through life alone, and as real as those surface-level relationships are, I think you’ll agree with me that we all need more. We need more truth, more encouragement, more hope, more love, and more friendship. Something is powerful when women get together and are real – but it starts with you (and me).
So find some women today and don’t be afraid to say “hey, I need to get some coffee (or kale, whatever floats your boat).”